We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
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