i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
Randomize
