he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
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