She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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