we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Randomize
