Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
I could have mohawked her pubes.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Nobody cheats on THIS.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize