All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
We need to feng shui this bitch.
Randomize