Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Randomize
