That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
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