after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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