you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
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