No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
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