you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
