pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Randomize
