Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
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