She's JV to your varsity
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
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