so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
Randomize