god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
