i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
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