Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
