People with herpes should wear stickers.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
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