So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
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