normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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