I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize