maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Randomize
