Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
Randomize
