We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
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