i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
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