you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
she peed on how many people?
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
