I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize