I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
