apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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