I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
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