We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
That accounts for only three of the penises
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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