Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Why did my mother make you get naked?
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
