after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
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