Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Randomize
