with your own penis?
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
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