redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
