Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize