hotel room ftw
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
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