My cat gives me a boner
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
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