I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Randomize