You can't special order awesome
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize
