...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
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