see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
I see more hoeing in ur future
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