he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
