We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
Randomize
