Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
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