he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Randomize
