I think i peed on brittanys purse
I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Randomize
